I grew up in Malaysia. My sister and I were trained from when we were quite young to be good girls. We were both usually obedient and well behaved. As such, we rarely got into trouble for behavioural issues. Nevertheless, we were still routinely punished. Why? Well this is what makes my story unique from the dozens I have read on this site.
Our mother was our disciplinarian. She was very strict and micro-managed all aspects of our lives until we graduated out of school.
Academic work was of paramount importance. Our mother wanted us to not just do well, but excel academically – and she pushed us really hard on this front.
You might have heard of the ‘Asian Tiger Mom’ – well, our mother was certainly one of those! Growing up, my sister and I were not allowed any sleepovers, we were rarely granted permission to watch television and we could play outside with other kids only at the weekends.
We came home from school, had our snacks and went straight to doing our homework. When we were young, our mother spent several hours each evening monitoring our studies. She would check our homework, give us lessons at home, and even quiz us to assess how well we were learning. She was our teacher, pretty much.
Mum believed in using corporal punishments to bring out academic excellence. She always kept a ruler and cane in close proximity during these evening sessions. If we made mistakes or showed any lapse in concentration, she would beat us.
During our younger days, getting the ruler a few times for some mistake or the other during studies was a daily affair. The most common form of punishment was hard swats of the ruler on our open palms. At times, she would even smack our knuckles, which was very painful. Even if we made a simple spelling mistake, our mother would draw our hands out and smack it a couple times. We then had to write the misspelled word a dozen times.
The ruler was also applied to our thighs and the side of our arms during these study sessions, as these parts were easily accessible and deemed suitable for a couple of quick, sharp swats.
When Mum decided to be more formal, we were made to stand up and bend over our study desks. My mother would then position herself beside us and beat our backsides and legs.
The cane was reserved for more serious stuff, like scoring below Mum’s expectations on a test – which, by the way, was a minimum of 96%! We would also be caned if we got a note home from school. We even got a few strokes for mistakes during evening studies, especially as we got older and the cane was used more frequently.
We always had to bend over our desks for the cane. Mum simply lifted our skirts and gave us a few stinging strokes across our knickers. Sometimes she would also order us to hold out our hands afterwards and add a few extra strokes on our open palms. Mum caned us hard – such punishments were very painful and always left marks.
My sister and I would dread coming home with a test score below Mum’s minimum. I remember I got a 90 in mathematics one time – the lowest I ever scored. I was so afraid to face my mother that day. I handed her my test and began to cry. Mum glanced over it, gave me a steely look and scolded me soundly for failing her. Then she dragged me inside and caned my bottom. I received two strokes for every mark below Mum’s minimum.
These frequent punishments for academic matters kept my sister and me on the straight and narrow. We rarely actually misbehaved because of the fear of Mum’s discipline.
You may well think that my mother’s punishments were harsh, but they were successful. After the maths test I mentioned, I scored 100% next time. Both my sister and I excelled academically and we have built successful professional careers.
However, I also have to admit that my strict upbringing also had an effect on my sexual preferences. I developed a strong inclination towards strict female figures and domestic discipline. As an adult, I regularly visit a disciplinarian to quench these desires, and the scene we play is always the same – a strict mother punishing me for failing to excel in my studies.