OK, so here comes a difficult one. I know that many parents who are happy to endorse the occasional moderate spanking have trouble with the idea of taking down their child’s pants to administer it.
For the anti-spanking brigade, of course, this is all ginger. Prepare for cries of sexual assault, perversion and much, much worse.
But for those with an open mind, there are compelling arguments for spanking on the bare bottom.
First of all, let’s try to agree on one thing at least. If you are going to use corporal punishment, then your child’s bottom is by far the safest and best part of their anatomy on which to administer it. The buttocks are sensitive but also very well padded.
A moderate spanking should never cause any real physical harm to your child. A smarting bum and a passing redness on the cheeks is all that is really necessary.
Having your child bare bottomed for spanking is desirable for a number of sound reasons:
- Firstly, the object of the discipline is for it to sting, as I mentioned in an earlier post. Underpants and outer garments will all reduce the stinging sensation and more physical force may be needed to achieve the same effect. This is obviously not a good thing.
- Secondly, a bare bottom ensures the parent can visually confirm that the smacks are landing in the right place (preferably lower bottom and top of thighs, never higher than the top of their bum crack) and that they are sufficiently moderate – no welts, no bruises.
- Finally, the act of taking down a child’s pants for a spanking underlines that they are about to receive a punishment you have taken some care to consider, rather than it being perceived as mum just losing her temper.
I know we’re all uptight these days about child protection – but let’s just pause for a moment to reflect.
Unless it’s totally impractical, I try to take my children somewhere absolutely private to be spanked – usually their bedroom – there are occasions with young children when I can’t leave the other child and thus they will see each other get disciplined, though.
Given that context, may I ask what the problem is? I dress and undress my children daily, I bath them, take them to the loo. That’s a lot of bottoms and privates I’m seeing – but I’m their mum, so it’s really no big deal!
If, as they get older, there’s discomfort on either your part or the child’s about you seeing their privates, you can always leave their pants on until they’re over your knee. After all, a bottom is just a bottom – we’ve all got one!
But really, I do feel we get unnecessarily uptight in this country about nudity, certainly within the context of everyday family life.
And to end on a controversial note (like I’ve not been controversial enough already, huh?), if there is a little shame surrounding their spankings, I really don’t believe that’s really such a terrible thing.
We are constantly warned not to ‘humiliate’ our children. But if you take that verb at its most fundamental – ‘to humble’ – isn’t that actually a positive thing in the context of child training?
We all know that kids on the cusp of needing a sore bottom are typically in the process of getting above themselves and being disrespectful. A smarting bottom – together with a little ‘theatre’ and a pinch of shame – goes a long way towards sorting it all out.
Contributor: Louise. Originally published in her blog The Spanking Mum. Opinions expressed are solely those of the original author.