Raising a well-behaved boy

You could say that I am somewhat old-fashioned and traditional in my ways, which in turn translated to my son having a strict upbringing. I was very careful to discipline from quite an early age never hesitated to give his bottom a sound smacking when I judged it necessary.

I don’t really believe in hand spankings, so began disciplining my son with a wooden ruler when he turned two. It was my philosophy that if I was bothering to spank my boy, then the punishment had to be severe enough to make sure he stayed in check for some time afterwards. As such, the punishments I gave, though always age appropriate, always resulted in a very sore bottom.

The ruler served me well – it was an excellent choice for smacking his little bottom. I took it with me everywhere we went, and knowing that the ruler was in Mummy’s handbag certainly made an impact on my son’s behaviour when we were outside the home. I have spanked in my car, in hotel rooms during vacations, and also in the restrooms of my friends’ or family’s homes. Over the course of several years, I even broke a few rulers across my son’s bottom – and of course, the instrument of correction was always replaced!

When my son turned seven years old, I decided it was time to introduce a new, more severe implement to family discipline. It was not exactly that the power of the ruler was waning but I wanted something which would make a stronger impression on both his mind and his buttocks – and that’s how I ended buying a standard rattan cane.

The move to the cane was a big one, but the changes it brought in my son’s behaviour was even bigger. He suddenly became very obedient, fearing the extreme pain and lasting marks which the cane could deliver. I used to give him the same number of strokes as his age, and if he had been very naughty I would beat him with both the ruler and the cane. I was definitely very strict with him at this stage in his upbringing. The ruler and cane remained very much in use until my son turned 15, at which point I stopped using corporal punishment.

Looking back, some of the best bonding I have experienced with my son was directly after giving him CP. I always felt so motherly when my son fell into my arms after being punished, crying out his pain and his sins. His soft, angelic attitude in the days after a sore bottom would make me swell with pride. I would shower so much love on him in these immediate days following a beating.

In my circle of friends, I was certainly seen as one of the stricter parents, especially because I used the cane, and I think there was some truth to that perception. Certainly, no other mother I knew used a cane on their child – the closest they came was the belt.

However, I believe that my strictness resulted in my son being far more well-mannered and behaved than most children at that time. His behaviour was an example to many of his friends, and I was very proud of that. I always said that I would rather be more strict and raise an exemplary child than be less strict and have merely a good boy – at least, that’s how I saw it.

Contributor: Vinita

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