Sandra lives in Dallas, Texas and works as a surgery assistant at a local hospital. At the time of interview, her son was aged 10 and her daughter 13.
Why did you begin spanking? Did you start with other punishments?
Yes, when they were little we would try other forms of discipline, like sending them to bed or putting them in the corner, and for a long time that worked with them. However, my husband left me when my daughter was six, and it was around that time that I decided to begin spanking.
Do you remember the first time you had to apply the sanction?
I remember my daughter’s first spanking very well. After dinner, I took her to the bathroom and put her under the shower. Once we were in her bedroom, I told her to put on her pyjamas but with no underwear.
Then I took her to the living room and told her to sit next to her brother on the couch. I put an armless chair in the middle of the living room and grabbed her from the couch. I gave her a good lecture, pulled down her pyjamas, put her over my knee and gave her a good spanking. I have to admit, I felt pretty bad after that first time, although it was the right thing to do.
Have you only ever hand spanked the children?
I just used my hand on bare bottoms until they were about eight years old, then I introduced the wooden spoon. Usually, I would give a hand spanking and then about five or six hard swats with the spoon.
In what position was that administered?
I always use over the knee, and of course bare bottom.
How hard are their spankings? How long does one typically last?
I would say I spank pretty hard with my hand. I’m not sure how long each one takes but I do take my time to do it very thoroughly. The state of their bottom is always red and a bit blue. I always make sure I’m calm before I give them their spanking.
And what happens after the punishment?
After the spanking I have always a good talk with them – I think that’s important for the child. If they are really upset by the chastisement, I will sometimes let them sleep in my bed next to me that night. As I say, I’m a single mom so it’s not a problem.
Do the children see each other spanked?
They do – I think it’s very important that they see each other’s spankings – it makes it clear to the other that misbehaviour will be punished. The one who’s bare bottom on show doesn’t like it, of course!
Do they ever both need spanking together?
Yes, that’s not uncommon. If they do, then I spank the oldest first, then the younger one. My son hates waiting for his turn over my knee, but that’s my rule!
Does anyone else see the children get spanked?
Really only my sister and her husband, which doesn’t happen often. My children actually stay with them once a month when I have to stay in the hospital over the weekend. I should add that they do both have my full permission to spank the children if necessary.
Have your spankings become more severe as the children grow up?
Definitely – I think they have to become harder as they get older – I’ve seen that with my daughter. The wooden hairbrush now has to be used much more after her hand spanking. Before, it might have been maybe 15 swats but now it’s more like 25 or 30.
How do the children react to the prospect of a spanking?
Well, they are always very fearful of it, of course, but that’s only natural and right.
Do they take the punishment obediently?
I can’t honestly say that they take their discipline obediently. I always have to hold them down to be spanked. There’s also a lot of screaming and crying, but I don’t have a problem with that.
Were you punished as a girl?
Yes, I was spanked as a child. Most of the time it was my father who did all the corporal punishment, and it was administered in exactly the same way as I do now with mine.
My father was very strict and he always punished us pretty hard. I have a sister and a brother, and we all had to sit on the couch in the living room. Then the one who was being punished was dragged to the chair in the middle of the living room, got a couple of slaps in the face and received a long lecture.
Then dad would pull us by the hair, put our pyjama bottoms down and put us over his knee. The spanking was hard and long. After the spanking, he walked you bare-bottomed to your bedroom and gave you more hard swats on the behind as you went along.
How long do you plan to spank for?
Well, as I told you, my daughter is 13 now. I don’t anticipate spanking beyond 15, as I think they’re old enough for other discipline by then.