When I was about 12, my mum went into hospital and I went to stay with an aunt, uncle and girl cousin for a while.
One Saturday morning, my uncle and cousin had gone out early. When I went to the bathroom, I saw my cousin’s bedroom door open and couldn’t resist a look inside.
Christine was 14 and I really fancied her but she obviously took no notice of a little boy. Standing in her room, I saw her school uniform on top of the wash bin and suddenly gave in to the urge to try it on. I pulled on her navy blue knickers and skirt.
Just then, my auntie burst in – she was furious! She grabbed me by the hair, pulled me over her knees and beat me with a slipper until I wept. Far from curing me, I have fantasised about the situation and tried to re-create it ever since – I am now 40.